Peace & Pumpkins

Last week I had the privilege of experiencing the most relaxing Reiki treatment at the hands of Sandy Day that I have ever had.  I can honestly say that I have never achieved that level of peace before.  After, I found myself very connected to what I 'felt' like doing for the rest of the day - extremely present and in flow.  I even chose to clean dog poop around my yard willingly and happily:).

I realized the tight connection between peace and presence.  I'm not sure if it's a chicken and egg thing, where one comes first, but I'm pretty sure that you cannot have one without the other.  Where you have peace, you have presence and where you have presence, you feel peace - a never ending wheel that I know I'd like to ride!  There are a plenitude of self-help gurus who speak, write and teach about the value of being present but I have found it a difficult thing to achieve for very long.  I have moments of being there and then tumble quickly into thinking/worrying about something coming up or looking in the rearview.  Now, with this new understanding of the importance of finding peace, I am more consciously trying to get there and maintain it.

Enter the Halloween pumpkin.

Yesterday, I remembered that Clayton needed a pumpkin at the school for today.  Shattered peace.  Ack, why didn't I buy a pumpkin when there were tons of them in stores 3 weeks ago (past regret - no peace).  Well, at the time I thought "who buys a pumpkin 3 weeks out - it'll rot!"  Racing around High River yesterday, not one pumpkin to be found!  OK, maybe there was one but it was the bottom of the box, weird shaped half rotten one likely from 3 weeks ago.  "Oh no, what if I can't find one..." (anxiety, future worry - definitely not present).  Completely frustrated by the commercial world, I mean really,  can't one store in High River carry enough pumpkin stock to actually make it to HALLOWEEN - I head to Okotoks.  All the while, muttering it's a good thing I don't have to be at a job right now!

Anyway, the point is, do you see how fast peace can slip away?  It is elusive and fragile but critical to being here, now and alive.  I mean, really LIVING!  And it can be shattered by a pumpkin.  By the way, I found not one pumpkin but three at Country Living in Okotoks - so thanks to them, I have happy kids, a restored faith in at least one member of the commercial world and I'm back to peace:).

I Don't Want to Fight Anymore

Over the past few months I've noticed something that fascinates me.  Often, when a person is standing up for themselves or something they believe in, they will reference that they are "fighting" for something.  Phrases like, "anything worth doing demands sacrifice" and "sometimes you have to be satisfied with winning the small battles in the war" and even "go get' em" are common in our language.

Why do we have to take the position that there is an opponent and start our actions from that belief?  If you believe that you are a victim and are defending yourself against some unseen force, what feelings does that bring up in you?  Helplessness, frustration, anger, defensiveness, hopelessness, exhaustion...is any of that really helpful or enjoyable?  Sure doesn't sound very fun.

I was very aware of this trend through our recent municipal election and accompanying campaigning.  I made my choices based on who didn't appear to be fighting.  I was much more attracted to those candidates who referred to community building and used hopeful, future-focused, momentum-building language along with specific, committed actions.  I think our leaders need to be very careful with and aware of the language they use and the feelings they evoke in the people they are representing.  I don't want anyone to "fight" for me - I want them to work for me and get lasting results.  One thing I know from years of leadership is that you might "win a battle" but, if you belittle someone you need you will most certainly not "win the war."

I read a quote yesterday from the Dalai Llama that speaks to this; 

"Once we have a firm practice of compassion our state of mind becomes stronger which leads to inner peace, giving rise to self-confidence, which reduces fear. This makes for constructive members of the community. Self-centredness on the other hand leads to distance, suspicion, mistrust and loneliness, with unhappiness as the result."

I don't want to appear glib or trite, but I think we in High River need to hold this quote in our hearts as we continue to march forward in our rebuild.  I know there are genuine situations where it does feel like  we as individuals are being attacked, repeatedly - but as long as we react from this position, we will get nowhere.  I'm not talking about compromising our needs or beliefs or giving up, I'm simply suggesting we think through how to position them positively with passion and relentless persistence.  

I don't know about you, but I don't want to "fight" anymore.