It's been 8 days since I started my Joyous Journey. I'm noticing, that I am now noticing, a lot of things bring me joy. I take quite a lot of pictures now, of sometimes crazy things, and it is really fun (maybe not for you the audience - but I assure you, I'm having fun:). I can honestly say that a majority of my day is spent in joy. What I don't know is if it's always been that way or if because I'm now more aware of it, I'm seeing it more. Really doesn't matter though - joy feels great.
Which brings me to another thought I've been having about feelings since finishing The Untethered Soul a couple of weeks ago. Somehow through life, I picked up that some feelings are good to feel and others are bad. There are some feelings that you just aren't 'supposed' to have. You shouldn't feel sad - if you are sad, you are depressed. You shouldn't hate your brother or sister, you must love them at all times. You shouldn't feel grumpy, just put on a happy face. You shouldn't be jealous, guilty, hurt, angry, frustrated... So what are we supposed to feel? Love, joy, happiness, awe, wonder, elation, gratitude - are definitely a few that would make the 'should' list. Can you relate?
The thought I have here is why should we feel bad about having a feeling? Feelings just happen. They come as a result of some stimulus and we naturally respond with an emotion. What I've learned, by being 'trained' to see some feelings as 'bad' is that I haven't allowed myself to fully feel them so they sort of sit there in my body, waiting for the next situation to erupt so that they can get the attention they deserve. But, when the next situation appears, they just get stuffed on back down again. I am a firm believer that these 'stuffed' down feelings lead to illness if they are not released.
Anyways, I think this thinking needs to stop. Feelings are just feelings. What I like about the book is that it invites to you feel what you feel and let it pass through you. I'm finding it helpful to see myself as a straw. So, if I'm feeling a 'bad' feeling, I just let myself feel it and let it just move on through. I don't try to make it make sense or rationalize it away, I just feel it. Last week I woke up feeling extreme jealousy for somebody that I love dearly. Pre-untethered soul I would have said something to myself like, 'why are you feeling jealous of X - she's your best friend' and pushed myself to move past it. Instead, I just let myself feel jealous. I didn't stew in jealousy, I just allowed myself to feel it and let it go. It sounds easy, and on the surface it is, but it does take a lot of self talk against the programmed self talk. When the voice inside me says, 'you are a bad person to be jealous of X', I say 'no, I'm not, I just feel jealous. I better stop here or you'll worry about the voices in my head:)
Anyway, do you allow yourself to feel 'bad' feelings without beating yourself up for it? Do you allow your loved ones to feel what they feel without attaching judgement? I invite you to try it.
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